THE FRIEND ZONE

Unrequited love. There are a million songs, movies, poems and tons of other Hollywood garbage about it. If you've never experienced it then you will assume that its like the movies, staring romantically at someone hoping they glance back, getting caught up in a love triangle that pits friends against each other, writing crappy poetry about them, watching them kiss someone else at a party then running away dramatically. I'm here to tell you that, unfortunately, all of that is true. I know, shocking twist. It's very much like that. Some of that has happened to me, some of it hasn't (Luckily a boy has never turned me against a friend) but I have experience unrequited love / like on numerous occasions.

I seem to have a type for guys that don't like me back. Although there has been many, many times this has happened to me, It only really affected me twice. Before I continue, I am not writing this post for pity. I don't want pity and I definitely don't want attention for this, it's extremely embarrassing for me, but I know that there are people who are feeling like crap right now because of a guy or girl who doesn't see them for what they are worth, and I don't want anyone to feel like I did, so I hope this post will help whoever is going through this.

The first time was the hardest (it always is), and it made it way worse because 13 year old me thought I was in love. It's safe to say I felt my heart literally breaking in half when he didn't feel the same, it hurt for a very very long time, I couldn't sleep, my anxiety was at an all time high, I was constantly comparing myself to other girls and worst of all, It felt like there was this dark cloud sitting over my heart, making me feel worthless. It hurt so fcking bad. I kept wondering why I wasn't enough, replaying situations in my head and driving myself crazy trying to figure it out. But, as time passed (Two years lmao), I realised that I needed to learned how to love myself before I could love anyone else, and I healed. It wasn't easy, but eventually I stopped comparing myself to other girls and I moved on.

The second time was more recent, it hurt but not anywhere near as bad, and I got over it ALOT quicker. I think after all the time I spent being upset the first time, I couldn't do it to myself again. I couldn't just sit there and let myself fall for people who didn't want me because I deserve better then that.

I need the person reading this to understand that you are worth so much more then a stupid boy or girl who doesn't feel the same way back. Whether its a crush who doesn't know you exist, a friend who friend zoned you, or a crush who does know you exist, but doesn't feel the same. Please, please, please see that you deserve better.

Always remember 

1. Don't let others affect the way you see yourself
2. Don't compare yourself to other people
3. Don't keep it bottled up, tell a trusted friend how you feel
4. DO NOT READ INTO TINY THINGS
5. Learn how to love yourself, and everything else will fall into place